Shiners and Harrassment Mistakes

Alrighty folks, time to spread the holiday cheer and spend time with the parental units. In order to do so - at least for me - means packing up and flying half way across the country. Lucky me, I'm accident prone. So, what happened this time? Let me give some background on this one.

For some reason the apartment complex I live in decided that moulding around the walls at waist level was a good idea. Now, this is not your thin moulding that is usually used along the ceilings, but instead juts out from the wall about two to three inches. I was, in preparation of packing the evening before leaving for the airport, shifting laundry. Somehow, I managed to misjudge the distance between the corner of the moulding and my eyeball, the result being a nice shiner around my right eye. Lucky me.

This bruise - and I'm half-convinced of this - is possibly the reason I was bumped up to first class on my second flight. The man sitting next to me was quite insistent on talking to me, the conversation taking this awkward turn:

Guy: So, what do you do for a living? *cheesey grin*
Me: Uh, I'm a vet assistant. *holds book up higher*
Guy: Oh, you help veterans?
Me: No, I'm a veterinary assistant.
Guy: Oh, cool. Do you like snakes? *leans closer, starting to dig around in his pants*
Me: Excuse me?? O_O;;
Guy: *pulls out iPhone* This is my python. His name is Monty.
Me: Oh...Oh, he's handsome...*buries face in book for the rest of the flight*

Wanted: Human Obedience Classes

It has suddenly occurred to me - ok, reoccurred - that humans are insufferably rude. A great example of this was the woman today that came in with her young son to pick up medications for their cat. While the mother gave us the evil eye waited in line for the receptionist to assist her, she pointed out our small Christmas tree in the back of the lobby to her son. The demon boy proceeded to toddle over to it and unwrap every single gift under the branches. The gifts placed there were simply for decoration, however there were approximately twenty of them in total, all of which had to be re-wrapped and placed back under the small tree. The best part? She watched the boy while he did it and encouraged him. Seriously, why are there no laws against these people breeding??

Just a Little Extra-Special

I came across this video, while just surfing the web, about a cat with cerebellar hypoplasia. This disease is caused by the cerebellum not being fully developed by the time the cat is born. Symptoms usually appear immediately, though it is not life threatening. These cats need no special care, except maybe the occasional catch when they fall off the sofa. They live a long happy, healthy life with no side-effects except some balance issues. In short, they're just a little extra-special. So, please click the link and see this inspiring story. This is Charlie

Pandemic of Dumb-Dumb Syndrome Continues to Worsen

It's recently come to my attention that no one listens to anyone else, at least when it comes to truly listening. This usually occurs when someone sings a wrong lyric in a song (i.e. "Hold me closer, Tony Danza," or "Lock the cat box"), but it has really started occurring with one particular word that we come across a lot at work. And no, it's not a complicated word like aminophyline (am-in-off-o-lin) or cefpdoxime (seph-puh-dox-ih-mee). It is, in fact, the word, spay. Now, I know what you're thinking. How can someone muck up a four letter word that's plain as day to know how to pronounce? In order to answer that I must first go into the different tenses of the word, and you in the back pouting about the language lesson, sit up and pay attention please.

There are very few variations of the word, "spay," including spayed (ex: My dog was recently spayed.), spaying (ex: Dr. Husband is in the middle of spaying that cat) and the word spay itself (def: a surgical procedure where the ovaries and uterus are removed, also known as an ovariohysterectomy [OHE]).

Now, seeing that there are those few variations of the word, how is it that not one, but several people can get it wrong? The best example I can provide happens - without fail - only on the telephone with people. The most common sentence the mistake is used in? "Yeah, I'd like to set up an appointment to get my (cat/dog) spayeded." Spayded. Yes, that's right, I said it. The fact that someone would use a past tense with an additional -ed on the end is appalling, especially when the word is so freakin' simple. I'm aware that I'm a grammar Nazi, but I could forgive this if it had just been one person. However, there's been a minimum of ten people I have heard this from, varying from white trash to upper middle class. Really folks? Really? I am horrified that the only thing I can do is attempt to subtly correct them and sit back with my face in my palm. I know not all pet owners know what IMHA (immune mediated hemolytic anemia) is, etc, etc. But, and I am begging everyone to do this for their daily lives and not just vet clinic visits, be aware of what you are saying when it comes out of your mouth. It doesn't even matter what it is that you're saying. If you're not sure, don't say it or ask someone about it. Hell, for words you're not sure how to use right there's this thing that's been around for forever called a dictionary. Use it.

Free At Last

Unfortunately today is a more somber post.

On Tuesday, December 5th, 2011, a particularly heart-wrenching case came in to us for an appointment. The patient was a blind cat that was fifteen years of age, brought in due to not eating for approximately two to three days. Upon arrival, the cat was open-mouth breathing - this is a behavior seen only in very stressed cats or those that are having difficulty breathing - which the owners chalked up to the car ride (the cat rarely left its home). Auscultation (listening) of lung and heart sounds indicated fluid in the thorax (chest), and radiographs were ordered to see if she had an enlarged heart along with fluid around her lungs.

During the x-rays, the cat began having trouble breathing. Another assistant and I were attempting to get a ventral/dorsal (vd) view - this means we were trying to get the picture to show her from her belly through to her spine so that her ribs all lined up over top of each other - when the cat began to panic and turn purple. During this panic, I was bitten on one of my hands before we were able to get her into the surgical suite to be put on oxygen therapy. Two minutes later, she passed away on the table from congestive heart failure (CHF).

This is not the worst part of the story. This poor cat was not up to date on any of her vaccines, including rabies. Because she bit an unvaccinated employee, the health department was contacted and they requested that the cat's head be sent off to be tested for rabies. As horrible as it sounds, currently the only way we have of testing an animal for rabies is to sample the brain tissue - this is where the rabies virus lives in infected animals - and that means beheading the patient.

For all the pain and suffering wrought on that day for those owners, I would truly like to say that I am sorry. I am sorry that your beloved pet was ill, and that in her panic for survival she lashed out due to instinct and it took away your ability to take her remains with you to bury her with your other lost pets. It was difficult to witness, and so I cannot even imagine the grief you are going through because of this incident. The most I can offer is the reassurance that she is no longer suffering. There is no congestive heart failure in heaven.

And so, in her honor, I am posting The Rainbow Bridge:

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

 
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together.... 

Author unknown...

In parting words, I simply would like to remind owners to please keep your pets up to date on vaccines - especially rabies (it's the law, folks) - so as to minimize grief and stress should something like this occur.

Unexpected Expectations

Ok, I have to start by saying one thing: If you're into recreational drug use, don't involve your dog, cat, fish, parrot, albatross, or any other pet you may have lurking around your home (knowingly or otherwise). It simply comes down to this: just because you enjoy your high, buzz, or whatever you want to call it, doesn't mean your pet will. In fact, this could have dire consequences (surprise!). So, with all the holiday pancreatitis, foreign body obstructions, and ever holly-jolly hemorrhagic gastroenteritis (HGE) - it even comes in Christmas colors, just not the right shades or scent - why am I nattering on about drug use and pets? 

I present to you Exhibit A: On December 2nd, 2011 a four year old male pug was brought in for severe lethargy during our morning appointment hours. Immediately Dr. Paranoid orders our most complete chemistry panel of bloodwork, as well as a set of radiographs (x-rays, people). Upon reading the results of both, she orders a complete blood cell count (CBC), the results of which are rather boring as well. 

Just as our Tech O' the Day is getting ready to place an IV catheter - on the off chance that it may  help the poor pup feel better, as Dr. Paranoid lost the game of Stump the Expert on this case - the owner decides to 'fess up. The dog had ingested pot. That's right, folks, pot. Marijuana, chronic, Mary Jane, you got it. With her hands the owner shows the approximate amount the dog ate, which was enough to cover the palm of the average adult human being. And it gets better, too. 

From what the owner relayed, she was visiting from Michigan and had left her "prescription" on the coffee table to go get a drink before partaking. When she returned, the green was gone and the dog had that guilty look - you know how they do.

And so, after a few minutes research - and an unnecessary amount of the owner's money spent due to a case of severe Save My Own Skin syndrome - it was concluded that the pug would most likely spend the rest of the day, if not also part of the next, being very relaxed. Oh, and the owner was advised that he may be a tad extra hungry as well.